No = Yes 
Maybe = No 
We need = I want 
I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry 
We need to talk = I need to complain 
Sure...go ahead = I don’t want you to 
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I’m beautiful 
Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later 
I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!     
Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you’re dead 
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me 
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs 
You’re so.. manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot 
Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive 
It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now     
You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?? 
I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV 
How much do you love me? = I did something today that you’re really not going to like