Some jokes!!!

A Man with Imagination

Banker : "What do you mean by telling me that you had seven years' experience in a bank when you never had a job before ?"

Youth : "Well, you advertised for a man with imagination".

I'm Not Superstitious

Personnel Manager : "Have you had any business experience ?"

Applicant : "No, I've just finished school"

Personnel Manager : "What kind of job are you looking for ?"

Applicant : "I'd like to be some sort of an executive Maybe a vice-president"

Personnel Manager : "But we already had twelve vice-presidents"

Applicant : "that's all right. I'm not superstitious".




The old soldier was telling of his thrilling adventures on the field of battle. "Then," he said, "the surgeons took me up and laid me in the ammunition wagon, and -"

"Look here," said one of his listeners, "you don't mean the ammunition wagon! You mean the ambulance."

"No," he insisted, "I was so full of bullets that they decided I ought to go in the ammunition wagon."

Hề hề, ủng hộ lời kêu gọi của bác Tacaza, em cũng xin góp mấy câu truyện hay hay:

Learning Memory Tricks

Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?"
"Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques: visualization, association, etc. It was great."
"That's great! And what was the name of the clinic?"
Fred went blank. He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?"
"You mean a rose?"
"Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic?"


Tìm vợ lạc

Trong siêu thị, ông nọ đến gần một cô gái trẻ đẹp lễ độ nói nhỏ:
- Xin lỗi cô, vợ tôi đang bị lạc đâu đó, chúng ta có thể nói chuyện với nhau ít phút được không?
- Việc ông bà lạc nhau thì liên quan gì đến tôi? - Cô gái cau mày thắc mắc.
- Là thế này, mỗi khi tôi đứng với một cô gái trẻ đẹp nào đó, thì bà ấy xuất hiện ngay lập tức.


Mặt trời hay mặt trăng

Hai gã say đang trò chuyện trên đường về nhà:
- Đẹp thật, nhìn trăng kìa!
- Sai bét! Đó là mặt trời!
Họ cãi nhau cho đến khi gặp một người lảo đảo đi ngược lại, một người hỏi:
- Này anh bạn, hãy nói xem cái vật đang chiếu sáng trên kia là mặt trời hay mặt trăng vậy?
Người kia nhìn lên trời chăm chú rồi cau mày hỏi lại:
- Xin lỗi, các anh định hỏi về cái bên trái hay bên phải?


Nói với con vịt

Bà vợ mua một con vịt về nhà, gặp gã chồng say xỉn ở cửa, gã nói:
- Không được mang con lợn cái đó vào nhà!
Bà vợ gầm lên:
- Đây không phải là con lợn, mà là con vịt.
- Đúng, thì tôi đang nói chuyện với con vịt mà lại!

Here's mine:

Christmas Cards

A young man approached the counter at which Christmas cards were being sold.
"Have you anything sentimental ?" he asked.
"Here's a lovely one," replied the salesgirl. "To The Only Girl I Ever Loved."
"That's fine. I'll take four - no - six of those, please."


Please Give The Steak Another Shock

Waiter : "Yes, sir, we're very up to date. Everything here is cooked by electricity."
Diner : "I wonder if you would mind giving this steak another shock ?"

What Time Is It ?

First Drunkard : "Say, know what time is it ?"
Second Drunkard : "Yeah."
First Drunkard : "Thanks."

The Bird Is Lame

A man bought a canary from a pet store.
"You're sure this bird can sing ?" he said suspiciously.
"He's a grand singer."
The customer left. A week later he reappeared.
"Say! This bird you sold me is lame!"
"What, what did you want a singer or a dancer ?"